I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
Randomize
