Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
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Do I have a choice?
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Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
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