so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
Randomize
