I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
