THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Randomize
