Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Randomize