Non-Jews are for practice
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
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