Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Note to self: the judgement that occurs when unrolling your last 5 which was used to snort drugs the night before, to pay for alcohol before noon on a Monday is worth just sucking it up and taking an overdraft fee.
Wait a min, you had drugs last night?!
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Randomize
