Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
Randomize
