Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
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