Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
Randomize
