Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
