i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
Randomize