oh god the rape fog is back!
Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
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