Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
I'm at about main and main street
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
Randomize
