I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Randomize