Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
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