peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
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