Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
1) I'm a decent drunk texter. 2) My world is spinning. 3) I'll give you a dollar and a hug for a glass of water. 4) I love you. 5) Example: your penatrive ways are overwhelming my alternative lyfestyle. 6) That is all.
7) Noodle arms: engage
The example was me just using big words while hammered. You're welcome. Ambidextrious. I spelled it right.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Randomize
