he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
