am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Randomize
