Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize
