somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
I'm going to jail i love you
i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
do nipples grow back?
Randomize
