i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
Randomize
