do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
Threesome in a minivan. New low
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
Randomize
