she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize
