Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
you guys were way drunker than both of me
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize