Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
Randomize
