The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Randomize
