I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
