There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
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