if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
Randomize
