What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
