So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
Randomize
