5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize