What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
the dj asked me quote "are you sure you're sober enough to do this?" And I grabbed the mic from him and said "ill fucking show you sober- HIT IT". I also dropped the mic at the end so he had to come around and pick it up
Shania Twain would have been proud
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
