"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
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