living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
It all started with a game of naked twister.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
Randomize
