apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
Randomize
