That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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