i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
Randomize
