But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
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