I CAN MOONWALK!
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
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