I just made out with a guy for $7.
Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
Randomize
