so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
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