How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
Randomize
