yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize
