So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
Randomize
