my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
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