Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
The ass gains better be worth it
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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