Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Randomize
