I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
Randomize
